Get Unstuck in Three Steps

Posted by Amina AlTai on

Hi friends!


I shared a quote on instagram a few weeks ago that you all loved!  It basically said, staying stuck sucks. Sure, change is scary, but nothing is worse than staying somewhere we don’t belong.  


Inspired by your response to this share, I’m serving up some hot tips on how to get unstuck from the stickiness that is 2021.  


Step 1: Release tolerations

​​tol·er·a·tion

/ˌtäləˈrāSH(ə)n/

noun

The practice of tolerating something. Allowing the existence, occurrence, or practice of (something that one does not necessarily like or agree with) without interference.

We all have areas in our lives that we are tolerating—putting up with either because we haven’t looked at it or don’t believe that another way is possible.  When we are tolerating things that are not in service to us, we can not only feel overwhelmed and weighted down, but it diminishes our capacity to hold what we really desire.  Ask yourself:

  1. What are you currently tolerating that isn’t serving you (examples include: bosses, partners, not making enough money, toxic behavior, overwhelm, being stressed out…) 
  2. Why are you tolerating these things?
  3. What does releasing these tolerations make possible?  What’s available to you once you release what isn’t serving you.
  4. What can you release?  By when and how?

Step 2: Shift your mindset 


It’s pretty easy to feel down these days.  The world is in crisis, 40% of folks are changing jobs, the pandemic has hit women really hard...the list goes on.  But it’s not just the times that are making us feel down. Our brains evolved with something called a “negativity bias” which was literally an evolutionary response to keep us safe.  If we saw a lion in the prairie we need to hyper focus on the fact that the prairie wasn’t safe so we could stay alive.

 

What this means is that our brains are more sensitive to negative information or unpleasant news. Our brains literally have a greater surge in electrical activity when we see, hear, feel or experience negativity. Researchers have found that in order to feel balanced in a situation, we need to a 5:1 ratio of positive to negative.  Take yourself through this three step process to reframe yourself out of a funk. 


Ask yourself:

What is the story you’re telling yourself? What is the Voice of Fear Saying?

Is there a limiting belief (belief that is keeping you stuck) tied to this fear? 

How can you debunk this way of thinking or turn this thought around by citing examples to the contrary?


 

Step 3: Cultivate a daily gratitude practice 

 

According to Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D., a leading gratitude researcher, who has conducted multiple studies on the link between gratitude and well-being, gratitude reduces toxic emotions ranging from envy and resentment to frustration and regret. His research confirms that gratitude effectively increases happiness and reduces depression. And who couldn’t use a little more happiness, especially right now?

 

Ask yourself:

What are you grateful for today? Whom are you grateful for?

How can you express advanced gratitude (gratitude for something you’re manifesting that hasn’t yet arrived so you can allow yourself to feel as if it’s already here)?

What did this bring up for you? If it was a lot, I hear you. And if you'd like to process it together and explore what's next for you, I invite you to schedule a clarity call. 

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Navigating Toxic Team Members

Posted by Amina AlTai on

Hi friends,

We all have that one co-worker. 

You know the one.

We’ve all experienced that one team member who is hell-bent on taking down the morale of the entire office. It’s heavy, it’s uncomfortable and it makes work downright un-fun.

Those toxic behavior can look like:

  • Aggressiveness
  • Gossiping
  • Absenteeism
  • Narcissism
  • Passiveness
  • Disorganization
  • Procrastination
  • Sexual Harassment
  • Making Excuses
  • Pessimism
  • Prejudice
  • Bias

I’m sure as you read through the list you’re thinking of a team member who’s embodied at least one of those. I've certainly known a few in my time. So what can we do about it?

I’ve created your guide to navigating toxic team members. Download it for free with code: Compassion.

To transformation and releasing toxicity,

Amina 

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Is Everyone Cut Out to be a Founder?

Posted by Amina AlTai on

The journey to entrepreneurship is easier for some than others 

For those of you that have been following along for quite some time, you’ll know that I work with both intrapreneurs and entrepreneurs to help them find alignment, fulfillment, and happiness at work. When intrapreneurs are considering a journey into entrepreneurship, the most common question I hear is, “Am I really cut out to be a founder?”

Today I’m sharing my take on that question, as well as the five things I believe you need in order to be a kick-ass founder.  

All of us have the ability to get on the court with our unique form of brilliance and share it with the world —but, real talk, the journey to entrepreneurship is easier for some than others. Many of the women that I work with say that a lack of access to capital is a major hurdle for them. According to Crunchbase, in 2019, 2.8% of VC funding went to women-led startups; in 2020, that fell to 2.3%. Women, BIPOC and LGBTQIA+ folks aren’t getting access to capital in the way their cis-het male counterparts are, which is a major stumbling block. There can be higher barriers to entry for certain founders.

One of the most important pieces of being a founder is surrounding yourself with folks who can fill in the gaps for you. We each have areas where we are inherently great, and we each have areas where we’re not so great— and I say that from a space of compassion, not judgement. Being a successful founder means knowing your strengths and weaknesses and building your team to support you in the areas where you need it most.

I truly believe that everyone can be a founder. Here are my five must-haves to thrive in the role:
  1. Boundaries: I love and live by the quote from Prentis Hemphill, "Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me simultaneously."
  2. Clarity around your purpose: Ideally, as a founder, you’re working in the business that is a reflection of your purpose. I believe that the great work of our lives exists at the intersection of: where our gifts are, what we value, what brings us joy, what we want to impact, and what we need to bring it all to life.
  3. Know your brilliance: As I shared earlier, I believe we all have a unique form of brilliance that we came to share with the world. As founders and leaders, we need to be abundantly clear on ours and be ready to unearth it in others as well.
  4. A clear vision for your company: Vision doesn’t mean that you are committed to one direction, rather, it’s a strategic path forward that has room and space for agility (see my next point!).
  5. Agility: This has served me the most, particularly in the current moment we’re in. As leaders and founders, many of us have had to quickly change direction. Business conditions change, markets change, our people change, the world changes and we need to be prepared to respond to that and move with it.

Take a look at this list. Where are your checkmarks and where are your missing links? If you'd like to explore what entrepreneurship might look like for you, hop on over here and schedule a clarity call. 

 

Amina 

 

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Overcoming Burnout

Posted by Amina AlTai on

Hi friends!

Newsflash: A year and a half into the COVID-19 pandemic, working womxn are even more burned out than they were last year — and increasingly more so than men. Despite this, women leaders are stepping up to support employee well-being and diversity, equity, and inclusion efforts, but that work is not getting recognized. That’s according to the latest Women in the Workplace report from McKinsey, in partnership with LeanIn.org.


The report went on to highlight that women of color continue to be on the receiving end of othering behavior, which likely only exacerbates burnout.  

The way forward is crystal clear. Organizations need to honor and reward women leaders who are leading in the most challenging circumstance AND they need to do the transformative culture work required to make their spaces one in which everyone can thrive. 
I probably don’t need to tell you this — you’re likely living it!  

But why are we feeling so burned out (current global crisis aside)?

Did you know those of us who produce estrogen actually have a higher propensity for burnout, anxiety and stress — biologically speaking. In fact, recent research has found that estrogen-producers are more sensitive to low levels of corticotropin-releasing factor (CRF), a hormone that organizes stress responses in mammals, making them twice as vulnerable as men to stress-related disorders.

AND

The brain system involved in the fight-or-flight response is activated more readily in women and stays activated longer than men, partly as a result of the action of estrogen and progesterone.

Layer in all the invisible labor we have to do on top of the very visible labor we are doing — of course we are burned out. I’ve put together a worksheet to help you mitigate burnout and hopefully shift some of the factors exacerbating it in this moment. Use code "burnout" to access via the button below for free!

To demanding spaces where we can thrive, 

Amina xx

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Passion Stacking

Posted by Amina AlTai on

Hi my friends,

 

I have a confession to make. For a long time, I felt deep shame about my multi-passionate ways. I felt something was “wrong” with me because my career path wasn’t linear, and I wasn’t focused on ONE THING. I would constantly get excited about new things, fully immersing myself and studying them, and I felt like a major flake. The inception of this concept was from society and my old community often echoed this sentiment, raising a brow with judgment followed by a monologue to the tune of “what are you doing now?” because they “couldn’t keep up.”


They made me feel like my multitude of interests was the problem until I learned that it was my superpower.




I wasn’t designed to do one thing. Some people are and that is wonderful but it’s not this gal. And that is likely some of you, too!


I began to share this with some of my friends, clients and colleagues, realizing that there were so many of us who had these multiple sets of interests who were just pushing them to the side.


We were made to feel like our naturally multi-hyphenate nature was frowned upon or it was something to apologize for versus to be celebrated. Being multi-passionate and bringing those passions together is what makes us magical. It helps us stand out from the crowd. It helps us express ourselves in a 5D way. It’s what makes you, YOU! 


Passion-staking, as we call it in coaching, is when you bring your passions together to share them in a way that they haven’t been shared before—and it is the stuff legends are made of. 


For a long time, I felt so shameful and insecure about my multi-passionate ways. 


  • I went to school to study marketing and economics and worked in marketing for ten years. 
  • I enrolled for a master's in marketing which I promptly unenrolled from.
  • Then I studied nutrition and was halfway through a master's before I realized that wasn't the whole dream.
  • I studied meditation. And movement. 
  • I started a corporate wellness company. Only to put that down because it also didn't feel like the dream. 

And when I did retire my corporate wellness offering, I felt like a big, ole failure. 


I remember the day clearly. I had given a talk at Deloitte, which had long been on my vision board. I landed my talking points, I moved the room, and folks lined up to talk to me afterward. And as soon as I finished my talk though, I ran to the bathroom and cried loud, uncontrollable sobs. Because something still didn't feel "right" and that scared me. I did everything I was told to do and yet it still wasn’t clicking. I wondered if I would ever find work that felt good, where I could bring all of me to the table. 


It was time for me to shift the narrative. I was seeking a new way of thinking and then I stumbled into passion stacking—but I had no idea it was called that or if it was even a thing. I decided that it was too painful to compartmentalize myself. And that if I wanted to live the most full and fulfilling life, I needed to put everything I loved and was great at together. So I did.


That is when I sat down to design my coaching curriculum, which leverages my business, mindset, and wellness backgrounds. When I started my coaching business, I knew I needed to bring all of me to the table to do this work in a way that was the most authentic to me, my purpose, and my true self. Who would have thought that coaching, meditation, nutrition, movement, human design and strategy could all work together?! My multiple passions is what set me apart from the beginning.  


If you would have told me that a decade ago, I would have laughed in your face. But, here I am bringing all of these modalities into my coaching container. It’s tangible the way this passion stacking shows up in my work.  And for the last seven years, I have given myself full permission to bring in all my passions and put them together in a way that is uniquely me!


Looking back at all the times I felt like I was hopelessly grasping at straws for the answer of what I was doing wrong, I realize was not a failure at all. I was in process. And the only place I had missed the mark was not giving myself permission to be all the (seemingly disparate) parts of me. 


Here is what I want to say to you that I wish someone had told me. You are perfect. Your passions make sense and can work together. Give yourself permission to be all of you because the world needs that very thing that doesn't exist yet. So, what is your version of this? If you’re multi-passionate, how can you passion-stack to get on the court with more of you and share your differentiated perspective? Let this be your invitation. 


There is nothing weird or wild about honoring yourself and your gifts. It's okay if others don't understand yet. Lead by example. Keep going—you've got this. 



To magical millimeter shifts!


Amina xx

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